When Autumn Leaves Start To Fall – Saying Goodbye
01 Saturday Nov 2014
Written by Elizabeth in Uncategorized
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Note: Please RSVP (egeniewhee@aol.com) by this coming Wednesday, November 5, if you are joining me for the final autumn hike and light, early dinner at my cottage Sunday, November 9. We will go to Mt. Falcon, a nearby Jefferson County Mountain Park, and see its famous castle and the start of a Summer White House in 1911.
“Autumn Leaves”
The falling leaves
Drift by my window
The falling leaves
Of red and gold
……
Since you went away
The days grow long
And soon I’ll hear
Old winter’s song
But I miss you most of all
My darling
When autumn leaves
Start to fall
A dear friend of mine has sold her home and is traveling this weekend back to her home state of California to spend her retirement years close to her brother, her only sibling. Recently another friend moved out of state to be near grandchildren.
Goodbyes – losses! Such a hard part of life! A lady-of-a-certain-age, I have become sharply aware that I cannot escape the inevitable – more and more goodbyes.
Autumn typifies termination – falling leaves, frost-bitten tomatoes, browning grass – and, ironically, at this very time, we acknowledge death and dying with Halloween today, and tomorrow All Souls Day, which is a national holiday in many countries. It is truly a time of year for goodbyes.
As a lady-of-a-certain age I have said “Goodbye,” to two of my homes. I truly mourned the loss of my beloved 1924 Craftsman home and miss the arched front door, (the Hobbit House, my grandson called it) of the architecturally delicious 1938 Tudor home I left last year.
A couple of years ago, I said “Goodbye” to my profession of 40-plus years and an avocation I have had since I was a child, starting when my parents sold our old house and moved the family to their dream home, a new blond-brick ranch house that never felt like home to me.
My yoga teacher told me last week that the days of doing certain poses that I love are over because of a back condition I now have. I had to say, “Goodbye.”
I have said, “Goodbye” to my little black dresses and spiked high heels.
Family is not the same anymore. Gone are the days of preparing Sunday dinner for my children and I no longer say to them each day, “Goodbye.”
In the past couple of months, I have said a final “Goodbye” to two members of my writing group, a favorite neighbor, and a high school classmate.
Forcing myself not to feel the pain of saying “Goodbye,” has never worked for me. Those darn feelings always came out one way or another and caused me pain and embarrassment. So, I’ve learned just to sit with the “yucky” feelings of saying “Goodbye.” Besides doing that, what has helped me greatly is remembering that I will say “Hello,” again to new friends and more of life.
One Comment
December 4, 2014 at 9:08 am
Poignant post, Elizabeth. I feel your pain. Goodbyes have always been hard for me. When I leave my home for several weeks to go back to visit with family, the anticipation of leaving it makes me sad. Once I’m on the road, I’m fine. The same thing happens at the other end when I leave my family to return home.
Several years ago when visiting a friend in another state, I was reluctant to leave. She had an auto-immune disease and was failing. I was afraid I would never see her again. I received a phone call a couple of weeks later that she had died.
On a positive note, the Comments section is working again.