Ladies of a Certain Age ~ for those invisible powerful, dynamic, vital women

“Elizabeth, why did you sign up for a workshop on time management?” I sarcastically asked myself as I parked my car.  “You — the queen of time management –haven’t you had enough of watching the clock after all those years of getting up at a god-awful hour to exercise, walk the dog and battle the interstate to get to your office at the crack of dawn?”

Shuffling to my chair I continued the sardonic query, “You’re retired now and can get up when you want to, do what you want to, when you want to.  You, Elizabeth, are living the American dream!”

Then, the presenter popped in front of the audience with such power, persuasion, and pleasure that I knew my “stinking thinking” had been flavored with pungent beliefs of our American society.  The myth I had bought into was ladies-of-a-certain-age are not valued or powerful or dynamic.  There is no reason for them to be concerned anymore with time management because they do not contribute to society!

The vibrant presenter Colleen M. Story apparently hadn’t gotten this message.  She talked as if there was no delineation between pre- and post- age 50!  Many people in the room apparently hadn’t either. I guessed the age range was 20 to 80. We had all signed up for her presentation titled, “Boost Productivity, Banish Self-Doubt,” offered by the Western Colorado Writers’ Forum in Grand Junction.

I must say that I have enjoyed not being tied to a timepiece since I retired.  Goal oriented, hard driven, I worked to financially get where I am today.  Some days I still have to pinch myself when I don’t set an alarm at night, dawdle over my breakfast, and play with my darling Airedale Terrier, the vivacious Bonnie Buttercup, or hold my cuddly kitten Katie on the couch in front of the big picture window.

Life continues, and –yes – my arms are wrinkled as a grandson noted.  I mourn the loss of Aretha Franklin and my two cousins who died of pancreatic cancer, also. Both were younger than Aretha when they died.

Colleen asked us what are goals are and to write three of them down.  Goals seemed like a unique idea at this age.  Then, I realized, I had some and why not try and achieve them even though they are vastly different than the ones I had written down in my Day-Timer in days-gone-by.  I certainly did not want to be like my Aunt Jean, who retired from Social Security, and told me she always wanted when she retired to deliver meals on wheels to the elderly because it was such a valuable program.  She never did and went on to say that she just did not know what she did every day; but, she was busy!

Another conversation popped in my mind when Colleen started talking about Betty, who was a very efficient, though grumpy office manager that loved to bake.  On Mondays she would bring to the office wonderful goodies she had whipped up on the weekends.  Mondays Betty wasn’t so grumpy.  One day she came into the office thrilled because she had found a perfect spot to rent for her bakery.  Colleen didn’t see Betty for a number of years.  When she finally did, she expected her to gaily talk about her wonderful bakery; instead, Betty was still the office manager.  The story reminded me of a friend who has grumbled about her job for decades; but, she never makes any effort to seek other employment.  She’s soon to retire and, sadly, has never been satisfied with her work.

Recently, I met someone who said they wanted to travel to Europe; but, then proceeded to tell me about planned camping trips to areas visited many times.  Go figure!

Another friend is “so unhappy” with the town she moved to several years ago.  She goes into the same vivid detail about where she lives every time I talk with her.  We’ve discussed exploring other areas, even volunteering in some of these towns, which are close to where she currently lives, so she could meet people there and also help her determine if she really wants to move to that particular city.  I’m pretty sure I can predict what we will talk about during our next conversation.

Thinking about these people, I realized that if I wanted to reach my goals I identified earlier in the workshop, I needed to get started and set aside time to do so or they would never come to be.

Colleen suggested various ways to gain time in each day.  Most of these habits I had done in the past.  They were helpful then, I am sure they will be now.  Here are a few:

1. Set aside time each day to work on your goal and don’t schedule anything else during this time.
2. The night before decide what you are going to do and what you are going to wear the next day so you don’t waste time in the morning
3. Viewing time in “chunks” helps.  For example: an hour to do housework; two hours to work on a project; and time for yoga or other physical activities.
4. Self-care is vital.  Be sure you put yourself first.  This includes getting 7-8 hours of sleep, eating nutritious food, exercising and whatever spiritual work you do.
5. Colleen also said to “do nothing” on a regular basis.  It helps to rejuvenate the body, mind and spirit. (I remembered Ovid said, “A rested field gives a good crop!)

I must say the workshop re-energized me, and I realized that however far down the trail of life I am, every minute counts.  After all, I am not an invisible woman and you aren’t either!

 Copyright August 18, 2018